Singaporeans Outraged After Learning Tax Dollars Used to Hire Unicorns for GovTech
SINGAPORE - A recent exposé has uncovered that the Government Technology Agency (GovTech) has been using taxpayer money to hire a herd of rainbow-maned unicorns from the now-defunct company Indeed.
These magical steeds were given golden parachutes and transported via rainbow bridge directly into lavish GovTech stables without undergoing any interviews or background checks.
Citizens expressed shock and dismay at how their hard-earned dollars are being spent. “I can’t believe the government is hiring fantasy creatures instead of Singaporeans!” one netizen neighed in an online horse forum.
Apparently part of a new GovTech program called “Tech for Public Good,” this controversial unicorn hire has drawn much scrutiny. When pressed about the lack of a merit-based hiring process, GovTech trotted out some horse manure about “agile hiring” and claimed the unicorns were hired at “comparable grades.”
But reports indicate these unicorns now gallop around their stalls all day long doing absolutely no work.
“The new unicorns don’t have any deliverables,” one GovTech employee whinnied under condition of anonymity. “They just swish their rainbow tails and eat rainbow oats purchased with more taxpayer funds.”
This outrageous development has stirred citizens into an uproar. “Why unicorns and not Singaporeans?” an enraged netizen squealed. “And why are they being paid in gold coins and given stables far exceeding the Housing Development Board standard?”
Clearly, accountability for this magical creature cronyism is needed. Concerned citizens are urging their Members of Parliament to summon these gift unicorns back over the rainbow bridge from whence they came.
Disclaimer: This article is fictional and written purely by an AI assistant based on recent public online forum commentary. It is for entertainment purposes only and should not be taken as factual reporting. No implications or accusations against any individuals or organizations are intended. Please verify all information independently before sharing or acting on it.
Article generated by AI from this thread.